Your first retirement community golf tournament
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So, you’re looking to purchase a home in a golf community. It’s going to
be great, isn’t it? Stepping out of your patio door and strolling down to the
first tee, or hopping into your solar-charged electric golf cart and driving down the
smooth winding path through the golfing
village, passing the other lovely golf course homes and condos to the practice green and
driving range.
Sounds really great, doesn’t it? Being able to play golf
anytime; 36 holes or more a day when you’re up to it. Just cruising down to the pro shop to
pick up a match and off you go. Sunshine, friendly faces, and your only worry
being, can you make that downhill birdie putt, or get up and down from the pot
bunker to the right of number 12.
Oh yeah, your first tournament at your new
club. Your new partner Thomas has been the perfect gentleman. You’ve both
played well and are 1 up going down 17. You smile to yourself as you pass the
house to the right before the dogleg left, knowing it’s yours, set safely way
back from the fairway, giving a spectacular view of both the tee box and the
green. |
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As you approach your ball, your partner, who’s ball is in his pocket
after hitting two out of bounds, in front of your house but yet not close to
it, points out that the pin is tucked very close to the front edge of the green
Taking your 7 iron, you settle in at address,
take a perfect swing, and hit it pure. Straight at the flag, as the ball begins
to descend, you know it is perfect. It just couldn’t get any better. A
beautiful community, great friends and neighbors, outstanding golf course
and club, and then, Oh My God, you hit the sprinkler head that didn’t retract
properly when shutting off and your ball careens into the huge sand trap to the
left of the green! No sweat you say. Rub of the green.
You can still get up and down
and tie the hole and go to the 18th still 1 up. You approach
the trap and it hits you, that not only has the sand trap not been raked
properly, but it looks like a couple of wild hippo’s had used it as a
mating pit.
Your opponent, Wilkins, after pitching up to 2 feet, says, "Looks like
Jones and his brother-in-law went at it again. They’ve been fighting over
which was better, Fords or Chevy’s, since they were kids, and each time it
ends up in some kind of bizarre wrestling ritual in the nearest bunker."
Who is
Jones you ask. Wilkins looks and says, "You must know Jones. He lives
behind the 4th green. His daughter is the one that comes down for a
month or so every winter and then parks that
rusted out 40 year old VW Camper in his back yard." |
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After taking three swipes at the ball to extradite yourself from the hippo’s
mating pit, you concede the hole and proceed to the 18th tee all even. When you
arrive at the 18th tee, Wilkins comments, "The surveyors were
here last week. It looks like it shouldn’t be long before they start building
the new homes." Looking down the fairway and seeing homes on both sides,
you say, "What new homes?"
"Oh, haven’t you heard?",
replies Wilkins, "They’re building another row of homes down the left or
the right hand side of all the fairways." "Oh, no", you stammer,
"That can’t be true".
Thomas, your partner, the gentleman all day,
said, "Oh, you thought those extra fairway corridors were for your safety
and enjoyment? Well don’t be absurd. Its the old every house has a view trick. These buggers do it every time. Before you know it the only ones that will be
enjoying this place will be the personal injury lawyers that will be representing
all these non-golfing idiots that get beaned while sitting in their backyard,
and the only views will be of an overgrown and abandoned golf course, now quit
your belly aching and hit the stupid ball !! "
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Now what were you thinking
about walking down 17 ?
The WSJ once published an
article that the 2 most important aspects of retirement were your annuity and
your neighbors and although we can't help you with your annuity, our guide to
golf community real estate will be worth a few minutes of your time......
To learn more about
golfing communities, continue your search here....
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